These Troublesome Bonds
by uchihaotakuhime
Summary: ShikaHina. "A genius, a strategist, a leader, a godfather, a teacher, a son, a teammate, a friend-and all she could come up with was that he wasn't a selfish lover." COMPLETE
1. Chapter 1

A/N: _Honestly, you could replace Shikamaru with Sasuke or Neji, the way I wrote him. But it's kinda what I imagine him acting, I guess. I've had bits and pieces of this one-shot for about a year now, but I decided ehhh why not just break it into parts and do a multichapter to see if people were interested in me continuing it...As much as I love SasuHina, I will always have a thing for ShikaHina, because_ To Be A Cool Adult _by_ gracemis _was one of the first fanfics I ever ever read. (So if you haven't read it yet, go read it!) Thanks for reading, and don't forget to review! xoxo_

If there was anything he was, it wasn't a selfish lover.

And yet, for all that he was, and all that he wasn't, was that all she could say about him right now?

Maybe. And rightly so.

She could feel the outline of his chiseled chest pressed against the back of her head, each of the muscles in his lanky arms as they wrapped around her. She feel his breath softly on the back of her neck as he slept-soundly, and without dreams. She could feel every inch of him pressed onto every inch of her as they lay tangled underneath the sheets.

A genius, a strategist, a leader, a godfather, a teacher, a son, a teammate, a friend-and all she could come up with was that he wasn't a selfish lover.

She mentally berated herself and curled herself into a tighter ball, only to be held closer by the naked boy- _man_ -beside her.

It was times like these when she thought to herself he might love her. After they had slept together. There was something in the way that he pulled her to him that made her question him in awe and wonder.

Because Nara Shikamaru wasn't the type of person to use people. And he certainly didn't use her. Not the way he was the one who left _her_ breathless on the nights they spent together.

"It's because you're a woman, Hinata," Ino told her once. "Of course you're going to think of these things."

And of course he wouldn't?

But as she felt his heart beating in time with hers against her back, why couldn't she believe that he, the genius that he was, didn't think or feel the same way she did? As she felt his fingers stroke her ribs, could she allow herself to believe he wanted her the way she thought he did?

And then she'd have to think back and and try to figure out for herself. Mostly during these times when he was asleep, like in bed now or in their frequent naps in the shade, as she lay listening to the sound of his soothing, steady breaths. Just him and her and her thoughts-because _this,_ this felt so right.


	2. Chapter 2

It wasn't absence that made the heart grow fonder after all. Seeing him so often at Kurenai's place between missions grew to make her instinctively expect his presence, so like the shadow she searched for in her subconscious when she stepped out into the sun. He himself had wanted to spend a lot of time with Mirai, probably as a sense of duty to his former sensei. She was Asuma's child too, after all. And since Kurenai had been Hinata's own mother figure for most of her life, she insisted on helping around the house and spending her own time with Mirai.

They became familiar with each other, and she learned that he was more than the lazy, witty, sarcastic genius everyone knew him as, more than just another person on another team, more than the boy who came around her sensei's house every so often.

While he had not been entirely indifferent about her, she had never been more than just the girl who was in love with Naruto, Neji's cousin, or Ino's friend to him. She was the Hyuuga princess, sure, but who honestly forgot that? She was shy and she wasn't annoying. And he was okay with that.

Of course, they hadn't really said much to each other at first. They didn't need to. They weren't people who needed to say a lot in the first place. Moving, dancing, in each other's presence in the house like two members of the same team, unbeknownst to them, in the beginning, that their shared love for the child was the driving component behind their chemistry. A diaper there, warmed milk here. A soothing lullaby in the dark of the night to soften the baby's wails and soothe restless nights after missions. She would think, "Where's that pacifier?" and he would have it already in his palm for her. He would think, "This is the last bottle," and the sink would be full of freshly washed ones. They turned and the other was there, yet they hadn't figured out how and why it worked. Maybe it was because they worked well in silence and what was unsaid that they knew what was needed.

Maybe it _really_ began on the day when a teary-eyed Mirai came home, bursting through the doors on one of the days both she and Shikamaru had been at the house.

She had looked up from the couch in alarm as Mirai jumped into her arms. She had been laying out various herbs and flowers out to dry on the table and now she pushed them away. "What's wrong, Mirai-chan?" She could see Shikamaru's pineapple ponytail standing almost in attention through the doors from the corner of her eyes.

Through sniffles, Mirai sobbed out, "We were playing and I wanted to be the mommy but Mana-chan didn't want me too and she said that I didn't know how to be a real mommy since I don't even have a daddy or a b-brother or a sister and I-!" The rest of her sentence was muffled in her shoulder. She raised a comforting hand to the back of Mirai's dark head.

"Mirai-chan, look at me."

The little girl pulled back slowly, a small pout still gracing her face. Lips and eyebrows were turned down as she met Hinata's soft glance, framed by unruly, curly black hair.

"You _do_ have a daddy, you know that," she said softly. "And he would be so, so proud of the strong kunoichi you are growing to be."

White eyes stared down into the small, red eyes so like her sensei's. "You _do_ have a brother-many nii-san's lke Konohamaru-nii-chan and Shika-nii-chan and Chouji-nii-chan and Kiba-nii-chan and Shino-nii-chan. Who are strong and brave and would do anything to protect you and this village." Hinata stroked the child's cheek with her thumb.

Mirai stilled and her face started to brighten with every word, though she kept her face downward.

"You _do_ have a sister. Many nee-san's like Ino-nee-chan and Hanabi-nee-chan- "

"And you, Hina-nee-chan?"

Hinata nodded. "Mmhmm," She pressed her forehead to Mirai's with that sweet, sweet smile. "And me."

"And we all love you," she continued. " _We_ are all your family. Maybe not like Mana-chan's, but we are still family. And sometimes the family you love is not the family you're born with."

"Now, give me your hands," Hinata coaxed.

Mirai stuck her hands out and Hinata gathered her small, chubby hands in her own. "You'll be alright," Hinata whispered softly, kissing the two tiny hands in her palms. "You'll be okay," Hinata leaned forward to kiss the toddler's forehead. Mirai's eyes closed and she gave a little grin as Hinata continued, kissing Mirai's nose next. "Because somebody-say it with me, Mirai-chan. Because somebody-"

Mirai's eyes shined up, both with forgotten tears and admiration, towards Hinata.

"Loves me, anyway," they finished together.

Mirai threw her arms around Hinata's neck. "Thank you, nee-chan," she whispered in her ear. "I love you."

And then she had run off again in the same playful spirit she had when she had first left that day.

"That won't fix her problems in the future," the shadow user said eventually from his spot on the porch with a raised eyebrow. "And she's a strong girl. She doesn't need stuff like that."

Hinata never looked up from her work, as she continued laying out her herbs and flowers. She looked so serene in the casual Hyuuga robes she had taken a liking to wearing. They flowed around her skin like a waterfall cascading and curving down the same beloved rock. Shikamaru had never seen anyone so regal. And like a queen, she had replied, "In our shinobi world, sometimes all we need to know is simply that we are loved." In almost a whisper, "It helps the hurt when nothing else can."

She could feel him staring at her through the open door, and she knew it would take logic and fact for him to accept her words.


	3. Chapter 3

It wasn't too long before he came home slightly beat up from a mission when Mirai used those words on him.

"Give me your hands!" she demanded to the young man who lay on the couch covered in sweat and dirt and bloody bandages, slathered in Hinata's healing salve. He didn't quite feel like making the walk to the hospital. Hinata had been so kind to attend to him with the little medical ninjutsu she knew. All Shikamaru cared was that it was effective.

He obliged, wincing a little at the effort to give the kid his hands, although he really did not want to move right now. They looked huge in her tiny palms. "You'll be alright," Mirai recited as she stood next to him, kissing his hands. "You'll be okay." She leaned forward on her tiptoes to kiss him on the forehead. "Because somebody..."

Shikamaru had frozen, by this point. This was Hinata's and Mirai's thing. They did this little ritual from little scrapes to when Mirai was bawling her eyes out, reeling from the effects of a terrible nightmare. He had always just stood by and listened, waiting for the day she would get over it and realize that true shinobi didn't need silly sayings like that.

"Nii-chan! Say it with me!" Mirai insisted. "Because somebody..."

 _How did it go again?_ Shikamaru thought in his hazy mind as he licked his dry lips.

"Because somebody... loves me anyway."

Mirai's eyes shone as she kissed Shikamaru's nose. "You did it, Shika-nii-chan!" she exclaimed, throwing her arms around his neck.

He caught Hinata smothering a giggle from behind the counter over the top of Mirai's head. Now, he could feel Hinata's ointment burning the wounds his chest. What was this heat?

"I'm glad you're okay, Shika-nii-chan," Mirai said happily into his ear, with a quick brush of her lips to his jaw.

But it wasn't the ointment, he realized later, as he watched Mirai play comfortably next to him on the floor near the couch. His wounds were much more serious than he thought. Hinata sighed with a worried expression on her face saying, "Maybe you should go see Sakura-chan, Shikamaru-kun."

Mirai had piped, "Don't worry, Hina-nee-chan, he'll feel better! I told him already!" Her eyes shone in his direction. "Right, Shika-nii-chan?"

And as he nodded his head, he wondered in awe, where was the pain? Where did it go? Feeling her confidence in him, feeling her need for him right here, right now, in this moment and in her future-that was what made him stronger. That, and her confidence that he would be there with her, for always. It was as if that fact mustered up some unseen force in his chakra that mended the torn tissues and broken bones itself. It burned him in his hands when she held them, in her little kisses on his face, and in her embraces. And he got better.

"Why is that?" he murmured absentmindedly as Hinata cleaned the healing kunai cuts that were left. She knelt in front of him on the couch, touching the salve to his pec gently. He stared out the open doors where Mirai trained with Konohamaru. Shikamaru's black hair spilled around his shoulders, his sharp brows sloped downward in thought.

A ghost of a teasing smile played at the corner of her lips. "As someone who believes so strongly in Naruto-kun, shouldn't you believe more in the power of will?" The strong smell of her salve wafted up into the Nara's nose.

"It's different with him. He's..." he shrugged. _Naruto_. How else would you describe him?

She shook her head, shiny, indigo tendrils falling from the messy bun piled on top of her head and framing her face delicately. The bangs she had once worn across her forehead were now sweeping diagonally down towards her sharp jawline, accentuating the angle of a high cheekbone on one side of her face and exposing a tiny, dainty ear. "It's the same," Hinata said. "If anything, it's stronger because you love her. It was strong for Naruto-kun because he loved the village, he loved his friends, he loved Sasuke-kun."

"And it was strong for you because you loved Naruto." It wasn't a question. His sharp eyes shifted to her face, remembering the time she had jumped in front of Pein. Vaguely, he realized all her features screamed nobility. Yet here she was, attending to him.

She flushed deeply and averted her gaze to her lap, her hair falling forward like a curtain. "L-loved."

He would've missed it if he hadn't been staring at her lips. It was easy for him to read lips. "Love," he snorted. "Don't you just mean the bonds Naruto goes on about?" He watched her wipe her hands on the towel on her lap and screw the top back on the container for her healing ointment. Her ears were still red, so he could tell she was still avoiding his stare.

Hinata dipped another towel slowly in warm water and finally looked up at him. "Well, a-aren't our bonds just that? Love?"

He had never really looked into byakugan eyes before (they were pretty damn creepy), but he could almost feel her staring straight into his soul. He wouldn't be surprised if it actually reached that far. Her eyes were wide, framed by thick, inky lashes, almost daring him to look into them, to fall into them. There was almost a sort of innocence to them, but then as he held her gaze, he found a sort of hypnotic mystery instead. He began to think that her eyes saw far more than a regular Hyuuga, mostly because she wasn't cold and unfeeling like the rest of her relatives, and because she was so perceptive to everyone around her. And because she didn't completely guard her eyes and her face like the other Hyuuga, he felt that if he looked too closely, he would disappear into white oblivion-open for her to see. He shifted uncomfortably, yet could not look away. It was almost as, if not more, frightening than being caught in an Uchiha's stare.

"Isn't that what you feel about Mirai-chan-felt about Asuma-sensei? Isn't that what you feel about your mother or your father? Ino-chan and Chouji-kun? Naruto-kun?" She raised the towel to his forehead.

"I don't _love_ Naruto," he growled, wincing in pain from the deep cut on his temple. _Fuck_ , what was in that water?

"You know I don't mean like that." She reached out a hand to hold him in place. "But you would fight for him, die for him? You'd fight _with_ him, just to stand next to him? You can't tell me that that's not love."

At first he thought she couldn't be right about this. She was a girl, after all, and she was probably driven by her emotions and feelings-it didn't matter that she was a kunoichi or from the most noble clan in Konoha. But she had been right the first time, so he thought he'd accept her words this time. She might be right again.

He was quiet as she continued to clean around his face with the towel, wiping off dried blood and dirt that had been stuck there since he had been recovering. Hinata's brows were furrowed and she was biting the teeniest corner of her lip in concentration. Unlike him, who probably smelled horrible from sweat and not showering completely for days, she smelled sweet-like desserts-with a hint of the herbs from her salve. It was... almost comforting. He didn't realize he had kept his eyes on her face until her blush reddened and she backed away, ducking her head again. "W-what?"

"I don't know why you're afraid of talking."

"Huh?"

He hadn't broke his stare. "With the whole stuttering thing, feeling like you're stupid, acting like people will kill you if you say something-although I guess that's what happens you grow up a Hyuuga," he said bluntly. "I mean-you actually say stuff worth listening to."

Her lower lip pushed out in indignation, as if in denial, yet her eyes widened imperceptibly as if what he had said was spot on. "What do you mean?" She realized then that he could read her just as easily as she could read him. Which was pretty difficult to any another person considering the blankness they usually wore on their faces, his out of laziness and boredom and hers through years of Hyuuga training. It was his genius versus her vision, yet they were just now finding that they were on par.

He smirked a little before pulling his eyes away from her white ones and staring past her to the young girl in the yard for a few minutes before finally gave a long sigh. "You're right," he muttered.

She didn't gloat or push the matter.


	4. Chapter 4

It was at that point she had found that he decided he didn't mind talking to her. He seemed to exchange more words with her, even outside Kurenai's house, and she found herself talking back. He was funny and sarcastic, his dry, witty humor something she enjoyed, and at times, reminded her of Neji-nii-san.

As for Shikamaru, he had discovered that she didn't have a lot to say, but when she did, he listened. It was refreshing. He almost was excited (but that was such a strong word for him) to hear what she had to say because he never could expect or predict it, especially from someone as quiet and reserved as she. She could debate with him, banter with him, and play her wits against his without being annoying or getting angry like Ino or his mother, and her voice wasn't as grating on his ears. She always did it with a small smile on her face or with a sparkle in her diamond eyes. It surprised him, and it intrigued him.

So Hinata was shocked when she woke up after an ANBU tracking mission with him sitting slumped over in a chair next to her hospital bed. His arms were crossed and his chin was almost buried in his chest, his mouth open slightly in slumber. Tiny baby hairs were falling out of his ponytail and he had marks on his face where his vest had left small imprints. _Why would he be here, of all people?_

The last thing she remembered was sprinting towards Kiba and Akamaru, who had been struck down by the enemy. Throwing herself in front of them she remembered turning to hit them with Hakke Kusho. Frowning now, she didn't know if she actually succeeded or not, or even if Kiba, Akamaru, and Shino were alright.

She shifted anxioiusly, realizing suddenly there was a small weight on her side. Suddenly, a mop of dark hair and red eyes obscured her vision. "Mirai-chan?" she blinked owlishly.

"Hina-nee-chan!" the child exclaimed. "You're awake!"

A small snore erupted from the man in chair next to them and they exchanged a glance. Mirai put a finger to her lips. "Oops." She giggled and dropped her voice. "Hina-nee-chan!" She threw her arms around the older girl. "I knew you were going to be okay!"

Wincing a little at the pain, Hinata scolded, "Mirai-chan, what are you doing here?" She glanced outside the window. "It must be past midnight-does your mother know you're here?"

"Uh-huh!" Mirai nodded excitedly. "Mama said I can stay here if Shika-nii-chan stays with me!"

"Ah," she whispered, understanding filling her features as she adjusted the little girl so she was sitting on her lap.

The girl's face sobered in an instant as she stared up at the older Hyuuga. Her red eyes were serious. "I'm happy you're okay, Hina-nee-chan."

"Me too, Mirai-chan." Hinata smiled and gave her a quick kiss on her small forehead. "I'd miss seeing this pretty face."

Mirai giggled and snuggled against Hinata. "I always knew you'd get better fast, nee-chan," she said with a yawn. "I wasn't worried at all! After Sakura-san was done with you, I snuck in and grabbed your hands and said our 'you'll be alright' right away."

Hinata's arms tightened around Mirai, as she inhaled the younger girl's familiar scent. "Did you?"

Mirai sighed contentedly. "Mmhmm! I even saw Shika-nii-chan do it, too!"

Hinata froze and her eyes widened in surprise. "D-did he?"

"Uh-huh," Mirai yawned again, her voice growing a little muffled with sleepiness. "He did when he thought I was sleeping but I was listening the whole time."

Mirai faded into slumber and left Hinata gawking at the shadow-user in the chair beside the bed. Shikamaru did..the thing?

"He couldn't have," she whispered to herself. It was hard to believe him ever performing a child's ritual, as a renowned military strategist and a genius, at that. She couldn't remember him even ever acting like a child even when they were children. She couldn't even imagine him even slightly touching her. He never touched anyone and he hardly never let anyone touch him, unless they were healing him, that she could recall.

"Close your mouth or else you'll get flies trapped in there."

Hinata's mouth snapped close in surprise as Shikamaru opened one eyelid slowly. "Y-you're awake?"

The Nara rolled his neck around and sat up straight, cracking his back and stretching his arms up above him. "Honestly, I've barely gotten any sleep lately."

"Hard to believe," she muttered teasingly, an eyebrow raised. Shikamaru? Not getting any sleep? _Yeah, right._ But she noticed the shadows under his eyes were more pronounced than she remembered. "Is it the chair?"

His dark eyes met hers as he settled back in the chair, this time stuffing his hands in his pockets. The corner of his lips twitched. "That and I've been coming here with Mirai almost every night for three months."

"Three _months_?" Hinata repeated, her eyes widening in shock. "That long?"

He nodded.

"But Mirai-chan said I got better fast?"

Shikamaru shrugged a little. "Her perception is surprisingly optimistically skewed at times. Reminds me of Naruto sometimes."

"Optimistically?"

She noticed a slight dip in his brows when he answered. "Sakura said your brain took a lot more damage than she thought."

"Kiba and Shino?"

"Are fine," he finished a little flatly. "Thanks to you."

She dropped her gaze and leaned forward to bury her face in Mirai's curls, wincing at the slight accusation. "S-sorry."

Shikamaru stopped his not-so-subtle glaring and closed his eyes, sighing. "I wouldn't try using your byakugan yet."

Now that he mentioned it, she felt a lot of pressure in the middle of her forehead and around her eyes. "Mm."

It was quiet for a few minutes, except for the sound of Mirai's slow breathing.

"Shikamaru-kun?"

"Hm?"

"Thanks for coming to sit with Mirai," Hinata began slowly.

"I traded with Kiba, Shino, and your sister a lot."

She turned her head towards him to find him looking back at her. "You didn't have to, you know."

Shikamaru scowled. "I know I didn't."

She shot him a questioning glance, her face twisting into a confused expression before she tried hiding it behind the girl on her lap.

Hinata heard him shift in the chair, sighing again and leaning forward on to rest his elbows on his knees. "She told the truth."

"Huh?"

His voice was muffled, since he had put his face in his palms. "I did...the thing."

"The 'You'll be alright' thing?"

"Yeah." Now he looked up at her, his head tilted to the side. "Whether it was more for Mirai or for me, I don't know," Shikamaru said honestly.

Hinata could see what looked like confusion in his black eyes. Odd, because it seemed like Shikamaru was never confused. He seemed to know just about everything and he was sure about everything that he said, when he felt like opening his mouth to say anything. "And that's the thing I don't get. Why I would need it. Sakura herself said there was about a 60-40 chance of you waking up fine. But that damned 40 percent was what killing me. Why I would need some kind of reassurance like that, I don't know."

Hinata sat in stunned silence as her white eyes were locked in his dark ones. "I just don't know." he murmured.

"W-well," she stammered as he continued to stare. "You'd get worried for Ino-chan or Chouji-kun wouldn't you?"

"Well, yeah." His brow furrowed slightly. "But worrying...about you?"

Hinata fought the urge to flinch.

Shikamaru straightened up and exhaled loudly, crossing his arms again. "Is troublesome," he finished.

The Hyuuga tightened her arms around the sleeping girl. "Is that such a bad thing?" she mumbled.

He sighed. "No," he said softly, his face relaxing at the familiar sight of her embarrassed red face, framed by inky blue strands of hair, buried in the black curls of their senseis' child.

Hinata gave him a tiny smile in relief, as the worry-free Shikamaru returned with the relaxed expression she had come to like. "Did you miss me?" she teased.

He snorted and averted his gaze, stuffing his hand in his pockets and leaning back into the chair. "Troublesome," he muttered.


	5. Chapter 5

Hinata sat in the beautifully decorated garden alone on the edge of a bubbling fountain, away from the sounds of merriment. Laughter, music, and conversation floated towards her as the small lights that hung from various branches of the trees surrounded her in a soft light and the flowers and plants in a relaxing and familiar aroma. She sighed as she let the night air cool her flushed cheeks. The hair from her simple, yet elegant updo was beginning to fall in small, soft curls down the sides of her face and neck. Her shiny, midnight-blue dress felt a little too tight against her waist, maybe from the extra dessert she had swiped along with one full bottle of champagne. Her black stilletos lay forgotten in a heap far from where she sat. But even as her head began to feel more and more heavy, she continued to take small sips from the tall glass of champagne she held in her hand, stopping every so often to refill it with the extra bottle. The anxious feeling she had in the pit of her stomach still had not gone away, no matter how many glasses she downed.

"Partied too hard?" a voice interrupted her thoughts.

Her lip turned up a bit at the voice that had grown to hold its place among her closest friends. "Hardly."

She heard him lean against the nearest tree, away from her sight.

"Shino said you'd slipped out."

"Sorry to take you away from all the fun," she muttered.

She heard Shikamaru grunt, "I don't do well at parties."

"Hmm," she agreed lazily, finally turning her damn heavy head at an angle up towards him.

He looked pretty dashing with his formal attire and the beginning of a goatee forming on his chin. His hair was down from his usual ponytail, though it was tied in a small loop at the nape of his neck, which somehow still ended up looking quite polished despite its simplicity. He held a can of beer in his hand.

"You should clean up more often," Hinata noted absently.

One shoulder went up in lazy shrug. "Ino."

"Ah." Hinata glanced down quickly before making a face at the abnormal amount of cleavage she was showing, and the shiny, chandelier earrings she wore swung against her skin as she looked away. "Same."

He took a sip of his beer. "How are you doing?"

Hinata closed her eyes. "Fine."

"Didn't look like it."

She opened her eyes just to glare at him.

"You kept messing with your dress the whole ceremony. You looked away when they kissed. You chugged glasses of champagne during their first dance and it looks like you didn't stop. You keep cringing every time you hear Naruto's voice-"

"I know." She interrupted a little too harshly through blurry vision and gritted teeth. She wondered when the tears had started streaming down her face because she didn't feel so warm from the alcohol anymore.

"I'm just saying-you _think_ you're doing a good job of hiding that you still care about him and that's fine and all but it's pretty obvious to me." Another sip. "So you don't have to try to hide anything."

She took a deep breath and Shikamaru thought he heard her mutter _Damn fucking genius_.

"Alright. Alright, okay? It just hurts a little," Hinata whispered. She drank the last of her champagne before setting it down on the ground with a loud clink, shivering a little and rubbing her hands up and down the goosebumps forming along her arms.

She heard Shikamaru sigh and shove himself off of the tree he was leaning on to come trudge slowly towards her and sit beside her on the edge of the fountain.

It was quiet again as he searched her face. Hinata kept it down, focusing on her lap where her fingers were indeed fiddling with her dress. _Damn it._ She stopped and finally met his gaze.

"What?"

"You're pretty drunk."

She raised her eyebrows as she took on the slight glaze in his own black eyes. "Your point?"

Shikamaru finished his beer and set the can near her glass. "Did Naruto ever answer your confession?"

"Ummm..." she answered, wincing. She took another deep breath. "Recently, before he proposed to Sakura-chan."

Shikamaru was quiet.

"And I know it was a while after I confessed to him but I didn't think it would hurt that much when he told me he didn't love me like I did. I didn't think it would hurt this much when I sat through their wedding. Don't get me wrong, I want Naruto-kun to be happy. He deserves all the happiness in the world. It's just-" The breath caught in her throat as she put her hands over her face, trying not to smear off the makeup that Ino worked hard to put on her. "It's just-I wanted to be part of his happiness, too, ever since I was a little girl and I saw him hurting. I wanted to make him happy."

"You know, each one of his friends contribute to his happiness-even you," Shikamaru said quietly.

"I know," Hinata answered after a quiet sob. Her voice wavered as she swiped at the wetness on her cheeks. "I just wanted to give him everything Sakura-chan is going to give him. I mean that's what I thought before, but I didn't think it would come back and hit me this hard now. Just the reality of it. The finality of it." One hand gestured towards the party.

"I see."

Her white eyes wandered towards the huge canopy where the reception was taking place, automatically seeking out bright blue and sunny blond. "Is it so wrong to think that?" she whispered quietly.

Her eyes were ripped away from the scene when she felt rough hands take her smaller ones. She looked up at him in surprise.

"You'll be alright," Shikamaru murmured, kissing the top of her knuckles that were littered with multiple scars from years of Hyuuga taijutsu. His eyes locked onto hers.

"You'll be okay." He leaned forward to kiss the space where her hair separated above brows arched over eyes that glittered like diamonds with unshed tears.

"Because somebody," his lips traveled down towards her nose.

Hinata was frozen in shock staring at him as he maintained his gentle hold on her hands. "Shikamaru-kun?"

The edge of his lips turned up at one corner ever so slightly. "Say it with me, Hinata."

"Because somebody," she felt herself whispering, her eyes taking the closeness of his face. He was all angles, thanks to the shadow from the light of the moon from above him, from the slope of his brows, to his cheekbones, to the slant of his jaw.

"Loves me anyway," they finished together, as Shikamaru kissed her nose with the soft brush of his lips.

Hinata's brow was wrinkled in confusion. She caught a twinkle in his eye as he released her hands and pulled away from her. Her face burned with an intensity she had never felt, even drunk. She ducked her head automatically.

Shikamaru sat back, giving her space.

"Y-you..." she stuttered, patting her cheeks to try and rid herself of her embarrassment.

"Feel better?" He drawled, avoiding her accusing stare. Shikamaru stood up and stretched. "Let's go. Maybe we can both try keep the Uchiha company. It looks like he's going to die from social overload. He looks constipated as _fuck_." He turned around, eyes towards the reception, placing one hand in his pocket as he waited patiently.

Hinata studied his back in disbelief as she took several deep, calming breaths. As if feeling her eyes on him, Shikamaru turned his head back towards her with a grin and a shrug. She couldn't help herself from smiling back and she finally rose, taking slow steps towards him. Hinata found herself giggling as she took his arm to steady herself, slipping her feet back into her heels. "Looks a little familiar to me," she pointed out. "Kind of like a certain Nara, don't you think?"

He rolled his eyes.

She laughed again, a new fluttery feeling growing in her chest. "Definitely like a certain Nara."


	6. Chapter 6

She wasn't sure when exactly they became more than friends. Shikamaru was never one to go beating around the bush. It was simple, what he wanted, he got it done. There were no games. Hinata was no exception. When he knew he wanted to be around her, he was. It began with the subtle things-being unafraid to invade each other's personal space just a little bit more, making more eye contact, longer touches. Her leaning on him in the hot sun after they had trained together. Her free, laughing expression after he had unknowingly wrapped her in his arms together with Mirai after one of their tickle sessions and the way she hadn't cringed away uncomfortably. The food she prepared and left for him before and after his missions. That feeling in the pit of his stomach when she was away. Coming home to Kurenai's house and seeing her there with Mirai waiting for him and watching the relief flood her face, even it was not for more than a second, before she greeted him. Meeting her eyes just a fleeting moment across the room when they were with the rest of their friends and the tiny smile she gave him before averting her gaze. The pink dusting on her cheeks when he caught her staring at him, or when he had been staring at her.

Hinata realized it as well, but she didn't reject it. She too found herself craving his presence, yet she couldn't figure out just what it was that drew her to him. He was not particularly a gentleman. He was almost a complete opposite of her sunny former crush, with his shadows and his negativity. He complained more than she had ever heard anyone, and yes, he could be extremely lazy. How could a girl like her fall for someone like him?

They even got into the habit of falling asleep next to each other. It started with simple naps during picnics or before they went to their separate clan compounds at Kurenai's house with Mirai in between them in the evening.

One night, they returned to the village at almost the same time. They found themselves wandering in the direction towards Kurenai's house. It never occurred to them that they had unconsciously been seeking each other out until they finally saw each other. Being next to Shikamaru could only be described as releasing a sigh of relief, and Hinata felt it too, in the way his body language and face relaxed when she opened the door to welcome him in. Mirai was long asleep, yet they couldn't bother themselves with returning home just yet.

At first they had just been sitting wearily next to each other asking each other questions about their mission. Her head might've rested on his shoulder for a second. The next thing Hinata knew, she was curled up against his chest. Their jounin vests were off, their hair was down, his arms were around her, her head was tucked under his chin, his nose was buried in her hair-and it felt perfect.

When Hinata realized the position she was in, she froze, her face reddening. But she didn't want to move away. In fact, she felt herself clenching her fingers through his shirt, as if trying to hold him in place.

"This bond with you is getting... troublesome," he breathed in his deep voice.

"I-Is it?" she whispered, her voice caught in her throat. She could feel him stretching his neck backwards so he could look at her, so she turned her face up to him. His eyes were smoldering.

"It is," his nose brushed against hers.

Her eyes narrowed for a fraction before she replied softly, "I resent that-"

" _Troublesome_ ," he repeated again gruffly. Her face heated up again as Shikamaru's head dipped lower towards her. He hesitated for a second, before pressing his lips against hers.

She didn't know when or how, but she found herself kissing him back. One of his hands had gone to the back of her neck while both of hers crept towards his chest, gathering his shirt in a fist.

That was their first of many nights together. Somehow spending her nights wrapped up in his arms relaxed her in a way that no hot bath or massage would ever compare. He agreed.

After so many days and nights with him, she couldn't stop herself from catching feelings. He was everywhere. She couldn't get him out of her thoughts, and it wasn't like he was trying to stop anything from happening between them. He actually made an effort to be next to her, which was saying a lot. The ease of saying that he wanted to go be with her was surprising, especially to those who knew him. And although they didn't exactly touch in public or show much affection in front of other people, it was noticeable that something special had blossomed between the two.

And yet, Shikamaru didn't say that he loved anyone. Not his mother, not Mirai, and certainly not her.

Why is it then that she saw it in Kurenai's approving smile as she sat back watching Shikamaru and Hinata take turns to wash dishes or cook dinner.

"You two practically act like a married couple," she had remarked affectionately as she combed her fingers through Mirai's unruly hair. She and Shikamaru had exchanged a quick glance at each other before looking away, Hinata with a heated blush and Shikamaru with what looked like a little smirk.

She saw it in Hanabi's teasing grin, when she said she would be sleeping at Kurenai's house instead of the Hyuuga compound. "Have _fun_ , nee-sama," she giggled, waggling her brows.

"It's not like that, Hanabi-chan!" Hinata had defended with a red face. "I just have trouble sleeping, is all."

"And Shikamaru-san helps you, I get it," Hanabi nodded. She shut the door in her older sister's face with another knowing grin.

Hinata's mouth shut as she pressed her lips into a thin line, shaking her head as she headed off. Well she wasn't _wrong_.

The carefree, light feeling Hinata had been carrying around her was tangible ever since she and the Nara had started seeing each other. Hanabi wanted to keep it that way, especially since it was so different from the shy, smothered girl Hinata had been when the object of her affections was Naruto.

Or in the wink Ino threw her way after Shikamaru made some excuse to end Team 10's training a little early so that he could walk her back to her compound. "Take good care of him, Hinata!" she crooned happily. Shikamaru only rolled his eyes and muttered something about annoying teammates under his breath. But the irritated expression softened almost immediately after he turned his eyes to her face.

Or in the quizzical look on Kiba's face when he caught Shikamaru's scent on her sweater. "If he makes you happy, Hinata," he had shrugged when Hinata tried to stammer out an explanation. He had been a little aggressive with Shikamaru after that, but only because he was a tad overprotective over his teammate's heart.

Why did she see it in the loving expression on Yoshino's face when she came over to Shikamaru's house? It would flicker when she caught them lounging on the couch together or playing shogi. "You bring out something in that lazy son of mine," she snorted when she and Hinata were mixing herbs in the Nara kitchen. When Yoshino had learned that Hinata was adept at making medicinal salves, she took her under her wing and taught her a secret or two. Hinata watched the normally hard expression on the Nara matriarch smooth out as Yoshino glanced at her son who was sleeping on the couch in the living room. She chuckled, "It may be hard to tell, but when a Nara man loves you, you'll know." Hinata met her eyes with as Yoshino gave her a sad smile. "That boy is exactly like his father."

Most of all, why did she feel it when she press her face against his chest, listening to the lub-dub of his heart? Or when he breathed her name, his lips against her ear? It was there in the fire in his fingertips and the fluttering of his lashes against her skin. In the soothing timber of his voice when he spoke to her, in the way his body automatically angled toward her whenever they were out together with their friends. In the rare smile he reserved for her. In the way he would make an effort to see her after a long day working when she knew he'd prefer to just go to sleep. In the way he constantly made her feel like she wasn't too troublesome and that she was worth the amount of attention he gave her.

Did she dare call his feeling for her love, when he himself never acknowledged it?

Ino told her he had practically confessed to his own teammates while they were eating their routine after-mission yakiniku.

"I was like, 'You love her!'" Ino breathed as she arranged the flowers in a bouquet Hinata was preparing. "My chopsticks almost fell out of my hands. And then Shikamaru, being Shikamaru, just shrugged away from me with a scowl on his damned face. 'Don't you, Shikamaru?' I asked. But he was all, 'God, Ino, I don't know,' you know, all annoyed and everything."

Hinata's face was red and all she could do was listen.

"' _Obviously_ , you do!' I said," Ino rambled on. "'I've never seen you give any female that type of attention _ever_.'" Suddenly she took Hinata's hands. "But you know, Hinata, this here's the best part!" Her blue eyes shone and her voice dropped to an excited whisper. "And _then_ he was like, 'I don't know okay? Like, love, whatever-I don't know about that crap. All I know is that I like being around her. I like when she's around me. I like talking to her. I like being next to her. It's uncomfortable when I can't see her, if I don't know she's okay. I feel...good when I'm around her. I feel happy? And content? And I want her to be around me for a long time. With me, I guess.'"

Ino paused for dramatic effect. "And _then_ I said, ' _Obviously_ you do.' And then I winked at Chouji, cuz Chouji always understands me, but Shikamaru just ignored us after that. Plus, he stares at you, like, all the time and he doesn't even notice it! Actions speak louder than words, after all. So, see, Hinata?" Ino said excitedly with an almost blinding smile, "That idiot totally loves you!"

 _He loves me?_ she thought to herself now as she was wrapped in his arms. She kept her eyes on their hands as she slid her slender fingers through his long ones.

"I can practically hear what you're thinking," a low voice rumbled suddenly in her ear.

"S-Sorry," she squeaked, burying her face in the palms of her hands and cursing his genius. "I just-"

"Troublesome thoughts," he sighed as he pulled her closer to him.

She stilled. "Y-yeah," she agreed, though the crack in her voice betrayed her.

He paused. Then he sighed again.

Her breath caught in her throat as she started to apologize. She knew he hated talking about... this. "S-Shikamaru-" Suddenly she felt a a small force like strong vines reach up and encircle her wrists and ankles. in a matter of seconds she was flipped over onto her back and she was face to face with the man who was previously laying beside her.

 _Damn him and his shadow jutsu._

Her face reddened as he smirked down at her. As fun as it was using his shadow techniques in bed, now was not the time. Her face turned down in a pout. "Shikamaru-kun!"

He ignored her, leaning forward to trail his nose against her cheek and down towards her chin. She felt him murmur against her neck, "But if I had to describe what love is-it would be you."

She squeezed her eyes shut, her heart brimming with emotion, as she felt his nose brush up her neck. She felt guilty at once. "You don't need to-"

His lips found hers, and interrupting her he said, "I know I don't have to say it."

Nara black met Hyuuga white. He lifted his hand to move the indigo strands of hair away from her face, moving his thumb along her cheek as he watched her expression. Hinata's eyebrows met in the middle of her forehead, her cheeks pink, her bottom lip tucked in a tiny bite. Her lashes were wet.

"You have become an important part of my life." Shikamaru leaned down to press his forehead against hers, releasing his shadow jutsu slowly, allowing her arms to relax around his neck. "And I want it to stay that way. If that's alright with you."

Hinata let out a breath she didn't know she was holding as she laughed shakily, reaching up to thread her fingers with the back of his long hair. "Yes," she whispered, answering his smile with one of her own.

"After all, I just don't know what I'd do..." Shikamaru continued, his breath mingling with hers as their lips met again, "without these troublesome bonds."

 _Fin._

* * *

 _A/N: Thanks for reading and reviewing, everyone! Even though it's not SasuHina :) Also, I don't know why my double hyphens aren't showing up. -_-_


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